Before and After: It's A Bigger Picture

Grab a picture of yourself from a couple years ago, it could be with family, friends, etc. Look at yourself closely, Are you still the same person now that you were back then? Do you still have the same friends, same hobbies, same likes/dislikes. Now look at your room, at your walls, even in your mirror. What do you see? Is it the same person in the picture because if so, your a damn liar. Look back at the picture, do you now realize that life is full of obstacles and that you change everyday. Perhaps now your more caring, more emotional, maybe now you get that joke that your P.E. teacher made in school. I look at a picture of myself, starting my senior year in high school and do you know what I see? I see a kid that couldn't wait to graduate, a kid that was looking forward to a year full of fun and laughter. A kid that didn't have the slightest clue that on the February of the upcoming year, his whole life would turn to shit. So if someone were to ask me, "Are you still the same person?" I would have to say no, because the person in the picture was a happy kid with a great smile and now, He's hiding behind it, to cover up his true emotions...

How To Save A Life

If you had the chance to go back in time and save somebody, would you? Would you change the course of the future they were destined to be in to a future that appeals to everyone. It sounds like the butterfly effect, no matter how many times you could change the future, the outcome always remains the same even if you do delay it a little. Going back and saving someones life could mean the ultimate sacrifice for you, would you still do it? Or is the natural order of things never supposed to be touched because maybe it happened for a reason and you altering the situation would mean starting another whole batch of problems. But if I could go back in time, not only would I save someone I love but I would also be able to save myself from the sorrow that now dwells in my mind...

And I'm In Level 3

After watching a certain movie about going into one's dreams and manipulating them, I kept thinking to myself, maybe this movie is hollywood's way of telling everyone that we really do just live in a dream. Perhaps we are all just sleeping in another dimension and our dreams are this dimension. Think about it, maybe when we die, we wake up to something a lot better or a lot worse, maybe we feel certain pain in these dreams to get us prepared for whatever the hell awaits after it. If you had the choice to go back and change a dream, manipulate it, change the people in them or the events that happened, would you? ... What if you could do this in real life, would our reality just turn into a dream?

Cupid Must Have Put A Curse On Me

Every situation, every choice, every action has a reaction. You go to a new city or state or country and there's a 50% chance you'll like it. You eat something, you have a 50/50 chance whether or not its good for you. You ask someone out and the reaction is either a yes or no. And even if the person says yes, theres a 50/50 chance whether the relationship will work or not.
But in many relationships, the guy or girl somehow overcomes these specific reactions and gets the other persons heart causing them multiple emotions and multiple thoughts. But the guy in the relationship always fucks it up, causing the girl much suffering and pain, therefore initially branding himself an Asshole. So the girl tries again with a 2nd guy and then a 3rd, but one by one the guy has screwed over the girl, but now the girl immeadiately stereotypes that every single guy is an ASSHOLE. But then comes Mr. Nice Guy, he attempts what the other so called "gentleman" did but he does it in such a wonderful fashion that he somehow gets the girls heart. He says things to make her feel like she has never felt, he makes her feel like a complete angel. Right when all the feelings are said and done, and he is about to make it official by asking her to be his girlfriend. The sudden thought of all her past relationships hit and she leaves Mr. Nice Guy without even saying a word. Now Mr. Nice Guy is standing there feeling helpless, lonely, and hurt. Now guess what she's officially become... An Asshole...

Are You Ok?

The words buzz through my head every single day. I wake up to them from the utter shock of living that moment again. And the only thing I can say after these specific words hit me is " Are you ok?" I know you´ve talked with everyone else in their dreams telling them your fine but all my dreams with you are on mute except its only on your side... I talk to you, hell I even scream to you and nothing. I wanna know what you were feeling before you left, what your last thought was, if the "afterlife" is all they say it is. I just want to know if your ok, cause Im not...

Where Were You?

Music is tricky if you think about it. Billions and billions of songs are out there to this day and yet there are always a select few that you believe were written just for you. I consider Kid Cudi´s - Soundtrack 2 my life and Follow Me to be the exact songs for these so called moods. But for some reason, The Fray´s You Found Me always hits the spot. Especially the line "Where were you when everything was falling apart?" Thats a complete aim to the big man upstairs, where in the hell were you huh? Was it fair to let my entire family suffer like this? Could it of been possible to atleast prepare us a year ahead of time? and yet as I ask these questions, no response will ever come to me... so even though the song still hits, its no longer where were you, now its Where Are You?

Bad Luck in 3`s or in my case 5´s

As if things couldn`t of been bad enough in 2009 and continuing onto 2010. Any news we recieved from Nicaragua or any news at all was barely good news but somehow it decreased going all the way up to Un-imaginable horror to still pretty shitty news. It all started with my dad´s death and then it progressed to us almost losing my house. The same house that I grew up in and when I mean grew up, I MEAN GREW UP... lived there for 17 years, that´s a long ass time. Then in August of 09, news struck again that my Grandma had passed away (dad´s mom). Although it was still a pretty big downer, I was pretty relieved that she passed because now her and my dad would be happy because they get to see each other again. Anyway, in early November , we almost lost my house again but this time it wasnt to a buyer but to the bank, which meant we couldve easily been kicked out on our asses. Then finally for atleast 4 months we had some peace and comfort, the house stuff had been settled and we were able to keep it but no-no fate was like "alright yall had your rest, now its time to ruin yall once again!" and it just so happend that on the day of my Moms bday, my great uncle had passed away. He was fighting a cancer battle for over a year and ultimately, it beat him. But once again, it was a downer but I was more relieved because now he wasnt suffering and he would once again be reunited with his sister and his nephew. So yeah, bad luck doesnt just come in 3´s the shit can hit you with any number...