New Day

I wrote this back on my dad's 3 year anniversary.

 It's been 3 years since we last saw each other and sure I can be sad about it but I've decided that being sad wouldn't make you happy. So what I've decided to start doing from now until the day we finally get to see each other again is to not mourn your death but celebrate your life. I want to thank you for being such a wonderful teacher, an incredible friend, a hard worker, and one of the greatest people to have ever been in my life. Because of you, I am able to hold my head up proudly whenever I get a compliment like "You look just like him..." I Love You Pop, I miss you everyday, and Thank You for everything. I end with my favorite quote, "Perhaps they are not stars but rather openings into Heaven where the love of our lost ones shines down upon us to let us know they are happy." (June 16, 1967- February 7, 2009)

Forever Never Seems That Long Until You're Grown

Tying up with my previous post, I believe that everything I do will compliment my future. I believe that since I have become highly dedicated with this whole writing thing that in the end it will completely pay off. If you remember from one of my previous posts, I had a dream a couple of months ago when I decided to start writing my book, that I was on one of those morning talk shows. I looked a couple of years older, in my late 20s early 30s, and I was promoting my book. And I could feel it, the cover, the spine, I flipped through it and there they were every single word that I had written from the very beginning. That dream is what made me decide to fulfill my destiny and that dream is also why I began writing on a regular basis. Now, when it comes to the law of attraction I'm a pretty big skeptic. I believe that things happen for a reason and there's no way that we can avoid some of the shit that happens in our lives. But, deep down in my heart I know that this whole project I have going on, this whole way of life that I have been challenged with, will give me the satisfaction of knowing that I was able to do something positive and make a difference in the world. Now, am I saying I'm going to rid the world of disease or stop crime, no but what I will most likely end up having an effect on is that person who has had a rough couple of days. They'll pick up my book and realize that they are not alone, that through the power of reading and writing, emotions can be settled and dealt with in other forms other than physical action. They'll be able to realize what I have realized, that the Pen truly is mightier than the Sword...

What Am I Doing Here?

 At least once in our lifetime, we've all asked the question "What am I doing here?" What is my purpose in life? What is my main goal for the future? What is the meaning of my existence? And I've come to that part of my life where I too, have been asking myself these questions. Now sure, certain people read this and think, "oh he's suffering from suicidal thoughts." That is not the case here, it's just that obstacle through life  I guess. My main question is, what will my future hold for me? I tend to have these really vivid visions of me sitting by a beach in a very beautiful house, basically living the high life. Then again, I've also had dreams that I have witnessed my death over and over again, where it has come to the point that I can see myself in my own coffin. The thing that scares me the most and this is going to sound weird, is that I'll end up dying way before this book is ever finished. Like, my demise will ultimately lead to the demise of all of this hard work and dedication and my ultimate goal of having this book become some form of a guideline for young adults be just a speck of dust.  So I guess I should prepare myself for anything that the roller coaster of Life will throw at me, for the meantime however I still have quite a bit of things to learn besides your only young once...

Big Brother

It's been a couple of months since I've last written any thoughts or emotions down. So I decided to go back and start from the Heart. And what has your heart more than Family. Anthony Brandt once said, "Other things may change us, but we start and end with family." Now, as you all may know, I have an older brother, his name is Jaime. We grew up six years apart but he's been there for me since the very beginning. In fact I believe my life is in debt to him due to the fact that before I was born my parents wanted a little girl, but he said he wanted a little brother to play with. And damnit, wouldn't you know it, here I am. They say family is that one grasp in this world that you can most definitely count on and it's damn true. My brother is a mentor, an inspiration, a friend. He's the person that can help me out in any situation at any moment. Whether it comes down to girls, career, school, sex, etc. I guess I'm fortunate, I know multiple people that don't have that kind of special bond with their sibling(s) or that are the only child in their family. So I guess I just wanted to say that I'm very grateful for having an older brother, I always have been. So if you have siblings or friends that are so close that ya'll could damn well be siblings, don't let them go, because I wouldn't trade mine for anyone else in the world.